Archive for the ‘My Boys’ Category

HUMAN MULTI-TASKING is such a PHENOMENON.

AT WORK, “one requirement” I mention to prepare new officers and at staff appraisal is the “ability to multi-task”. Of course, as an employee, I am required to REALLY multi-task too. 

[Frankly, till I lose my job focus sometimes.]

As working parents, our multi-tasking skill is further stretched.

We have been tested and proven that human ability to handle between 2 or more tasks AND aspiring to deliver the best for 2 or more important responsibilities at the SAME TIME —- IS POSSIBLE!

[although VERY CHALLENGING!!]

Yeah?

 Nowadays, I hardly hear about people implying that they do not need to multi-task.

———–

Even for my boys….In school, there are times when they have to be Group Leader/Monitor and STUDENT concurrently. Other times when they try to use that short interval of 20 minutes during recess break to rush off to bookshop, play with friends and still fill their stomachs.

At home, they are sometimes found playing or reading or even writing WHILE eating; singing while bathing; dozing off while doing school homeworks; AND reading while doing that business in the toilet.

For parents while at home, we multi-task among the housework, spending time with our kids, running our own errands and …….

Just that in parenting, we contentedly choose to and not being assigned to multi-task. Given that limited hours in a day to spend quality time  with family and for oneself…..

And when I have to see my PARTNER IN LIFE multi-task as a PARENT, especially these particular moments…..

It amuses me.

But it also demonstrates how an exhausted father could have chosen sleep but prefers — to relax and also spends time with his kids instead, in return for that FAMILY JOY. * I salute him*

Papa spending time with the boys on a game of chess while enjoying a leg and back massage.

Next, Papa playing 2 different types of Board Games, with two different boys at the same time.  I will never be able to concentrate like this on two games that require thinking unless I am out to lose..haha.

I am not sure if our boys APPRECIATE moments like these. However, I know they definitely ENJOYED themselves while I watched on this time - for a change.  Hence, every moment like this, is WORTH IT *grin*

The result of a parent’s equal attention for both kids and fairness despite multi-tasking - Abundance of Happiness and Laughters.  

Moments of multi-tasking like this for our family — are what MAKES our LIFE CHALLENGING but FULFILLING & COMPLETE.

And, we make full and good use of our time —- to develop super abilities and skills too *haha*.

At 7 years 1 month, he continues to

* Be complained by teachers for not paying attention in class

* Avoid doing school homeworks

* Deny his mistakes but never fail to give tell-tale signs with his eyes

* Wet his bed when he gets too cosy under his warm quilt

* Disturb his elder brother so often that they ended up in fights, until he lost a front tooth (Sigh! Sigh!)

* Jump three flights of steps at a time despite warning

* Laugh aloud as long as he is happy regardless of time and venue

* Gobble all his rice and noodles and leave the dishes intact

* Dance and dash instead of walk, until he ended up with a Panda Eye (Oh Gosh!)

* Speak as he wishes without thinking twice

* Leave his things everywhere at home except the designated spots

* Destroy things that he lays hands on effortlessly

* Be distance away even before we finish giving our instructions

* Create unnecessary actions sometimes just to see our angry reactions

* Pester persistently, hoping that we will surrender

Still..still… he remains such a lovely and innocent baby and it is unbearable to make him cry:)

However, it is also him who

* Brings much laughter to our lives, being always the most cheerful person at home

* Shows me what it is like to live with happiness for the moment and not worries for the future

* Sends me the most mushy love messages that I have ever received in my life since he learns to SMS a month ago

* Gives me surprises every now and then, with his thoughtful cards and sometimes hilarious actions

* Tries to play the big brother instead, showing Brendan how things can be done where his elder brother lacks the skill or confidence

* Teaches me that one can be independant and exploring to create that FUN journey in learning

* Wriggles besides me when I am sick, to tell me that he gave me a massage while I was asleep

* Cheers us up with his unique mannerism when things get tough at home

* Spreads joy and fun with his presence

* Volunteers to help out with little chores at home

* Displays to us that one can be versatile in life as long as he chooses to

* Convinces us that he is still a very SWEET BABY despite letting us blow our top sometimes

* Enables me to enjoy the JOY of a family life with siblings, a privilege that I have never had before

* Makes me look forward to his voluntary phone calls, almost everyday from school

* Never fail to delight us of the quick progress he can make in anything he does as long as he is serious and interested

His fun-loving and happy self:)

Sometimes, I wonder when he will start to observe some disciplines in life as he grows.  However, I LOVE the smiles on his face, the innocence that he shares AND  the excitement that he has and I WISH he can continue to enjoy his carefree childhood days.

I believe time might take away his playfulness and his innocence but time will not take away his fun-loving nature and sunshine that he brings to people around him.

EVERYTHING ABOUT DARREN — IS WHAT MAKES HIM VERY SPECIAL — AND HE WILL REMAIN TO BE SPECIAL ALWAYS IN OUR HEART.

IT HAS BEEN AN ENJOYABLE AND REWARDING JOURNEY TO TRAVEL WITH HIM IN OUR LIVES. 

- {A special love dedication from mommy as Darren turned 7 years old.}-  

Singapore may be small.  However, I love the easy access to the beaches and also the large number of parks.

Nature never fails to give me the serenity that I need and keep my young ones “well and healthily” occupied too.

[instead of following mommy uninterestingly in a shopping complex.]

There are a number of beaches cum parks here eg. East Coast Park, Pasir Ris Park and Labrador Park. 

Labrador Park, besides its beach, diversity of flora and fauna, is an educational site too - rich with historcial relics (click to read our previous post on Labrador Nature Reserve).

In the photos above, the boys were standing before a symbolic replica of the Dragon’s Teeth Gate (Long Ya Men).

The Dragon’s Teeth Gate used to be located at the gateway to Keppel Harbour in Singapore, to provide navigational aids. It was useful as navigational aids to Ming Dynasty’s Admiral Zheng He during his maritime voyages to the west.  Read more about its history HERE.  

More photos of historical relics here.

Children being children. What interests them most are still …..

The BEACH…..

where people are fishing, enjoying that cool breeze and where Brendan gazed at the sea “wordless” (obviously in deep thoughts).

The PARK……

where they can stroll, jog, run, cycle and basically “HAVE FUN”.

A park will not be complete without its flora and fauna.

I am a plant lover and colourful blooms are always an attraction.

 [Photo courtesy by Papa Ed as I got too distracted by the pair of lover butterflies to capture any shots....haha.]

Bring your kids to the park and open their world to the habitat of the flora and fauna.

If we are paying enough attention, we might have a close encounter with the insects and fauna.

Darren, sometimes enjoys spotting them. Other times, he will flee off after his brother with their chasing games *Smile*.

And….

My boys always finds extra fun, playing with the puppies of other park lovers.

THE PLAYGROUND….

Kids love playground. Seriously, adults play at the playground here too….. One of them is ME…haha.

This is the place where I mentioned in a recent post about the MAZE and hide-and-seek where I had fun with my boys.

So, do expose your kids to more Greenery and Healthy Lifestyle while they still care to tag along with the parents.

There is a whole Green Environment out there!

It is certainly more comfortable to stay in air-conditioned complex with the kids.

But

the sweats and the walk at the Green Outdoor is definitely more WORTH IT!

Once in a while, we immerse ourselves in our kids’ world.

We play PS3, arcade and ball games together. We play hide-and-seek and chasing. We engage in water splashing challenge in the pool. We allow the kids to win us in board games. He crawls/climbs with the kids at the playground.  I let my hair down and sing/dance with the kids. He challenges the kids to games of arm wrestling. Many more…

These are our childish moments together *hee*.

[I find these moments easier to treasure and remember instead of those shopping and movie watching moments together.]

It is FUN!

It enables us to relive our childhood life and  experience the joy that we have never had before.

It allows our Papa Ed, who usually plays the firm father role, to show his fun-loving side to the kids.

It makes us feel YOUNGER although not as energetic as before.

It allows our kids to feel a sense of pride because these are some moments that they can outshine their parents *haha*.

Most importantly, these are one of those QUALITY TIME that we engage ourselves with our kids. All enjoy it!

And…I would very much like our kids to carry these memories with them even as they grow - the PARENT TIMES that we have much FUN, LAUGHTER and ENJOYMENT together as a family.

Yay!

See what I mean when I say that it is FUN….we  find true meanings in this fun way of bonding *smile*.

The kids hiding from mommy

Mommy giving chase

Darren claiming victory because mommy was slower to find her way out of the maze

I love the bright smiles on the kids’ faces

Never too old to be sporty..hee.. not that we are that old now.

Not as agile as before but never a constrain to be part of our kids’ play

Lately, I have not been feeling too well.

It is true that STRESS somehow can make one feel sick.

[Take my advice: Don't let STRESS accumulate. We are not invincible.]

So, last week, I made time to go to the hospital for a medical check-up.

Though I didn’t express it, I actually felt worried (These are the kind of self-imposed worries when one delays a medical check-up for too long, often citing excuses like busy, I am feeling better now etc.).

Yeah, I am guilty.  I have allowed PRESSURE to affect my health *frown*.

Just when I was sitting there waiting ages for my scanning to be done, someone dropped me THE SWEETEST SMS - when I least expected it.

This person actually remembered the appointment time of my scanning and doctor’s consultation*smile* (Ha, I won’t be so surprised if it had come from hubby who was actually with me for the check-up).

The most touching part - it is one of the rare time that I received a motivational SMS from my boy, Brendan - just when I needed it. I didn’t think that my young one will be mindful of a medical appointment that I vaguely mentioned.

Hee…Telepathy?? 

I reckon that my boy appreciates his parents’  love and concern for him when he had his little accident recently. He is reciprocating to show his care and love.

I am touched by this thoughtful and sincere SMS *sweet smile*.

[This is another encouraging moment of motherhood despite the other moments of frustrations]

[He ended up extracting a wrong and perfectly good tooth! You may wish to read that earlier post by clicking here

 We have started to appreciate how important it is to find the right dentist for a child- one who has the patience and right attitude with children, adopt consultative approach with parents and is approachable.

Since that incident, we are glad that we have finally found one that both our boys feel extremely comfortable with *smile*.

So, I thought it is a good new start since the children's impression on visits to dentist is formed since young.

"Comfortable" is key if we do not want our children to bring their phobia of dentist consultation till Adulthood especially when the regular dentist check-up is always necessary.

This is what I mean by having the comfort and feelings of the children at heart - teddy bear and sunglasses (courtesy of the dental clinic)

For our friends, who are still concerned about Darren after that scary incident in March, I am glad to share that he is now volunteering to visit his new regular dentist for cleaning of his teeth.

[Though his school has dental service, I prefer that he feels comfortable first].

However, his phobia of tooth extraction is still there and I believe it will take a long while for him to erase that memory of fear and pain.

Afterall, that last experience has been an extremely painful, traumatic and undeserving one. Definitely, not an acceptable and normal act by a dentist *sigh*.

I have noticed since some time ago - that our guys at home can never tolerate idling time.

[Hmm...perhaps it is parental influence cos we cannot stand a moment waiting restlessly. Or ...perhaps it is the destiny of us living in a fast-paced society when time waits for no man.]

For instance, these are what our guys are always engaged in when we are waiting for food to be served for everyone.

Without fail.

Playing games with their Nintendo DS game sets or hooked to their handphone games/sms/web-surfing …..

[Chatting is reserved for car rides and home hours. Common excuse is : it is too noisy to chat in a restaurant or diners at the next table can overhear.]

 Arghhh….

Try communicating and the responses will probably be “uninterestingly short” or “slow”.

Try removing their game sets, and I will have two boys demanding for our handphones or messing with my camera.

Or otherwise, we will have one guy “sleeping” somehow even before food is served *haha*.

[I prefer my mom's generations cos while waiting for food, she interacts, observes people around her and shares tales *grin*. Compared to older days, generally, it is amazing how these gadgets have gradually become much more "attractive" than humans.]

So, this is the marked similarity of our guys at home, regardless of age, interests and level of waiting patience.

Hee…

Actually, I am not much better cos I have the tendency to snap with my phone or camera especially when our guys have forgotten my presence *hee*.

Fact established: The high dependance of mankind on technology, each day in our lives.

 Then,

what is your story when you have idle time?

Heavy reliance on IT and electronic gadgets - are you also facing this in your family?

What special programme would you plan for your  young one on his/her birthday? An annual birthday party? An outing? Usually, are daddies and mommies both in charge of planning?

Today is my little one, Darren’s birthday. He has just turned 7 years old.

We know Darren does not like a massive celebration and so has mostly celebrated as a family. At least, for the first few years of his education, his BIG DAY will always be a school holiday since it is a day after the Singapore National Day *smile*.

Darren picks another of his favourite Pokemon Character "Psyduck" to be drawn on his cake.

In our family, each of us has a little contribution in making Darren’s birthday FUN and MEMORABLE.  

Mommy takes charge of buying and wrapping the presents, decorating the house, organising the programmes, and taking a day off to spend time with Darren.

Brendan takes charge of hiding and setting the clues for Darren to discover the presents.

Papa takes charge of taking the photos and videos, and also casting aside all other commitments to spend time with Darren.

Darren takes charge of choosing his own cake.

The day ends off happy with grandparents joining us for the cake-cutting.

At least Darren has fun.

In his words, he is happy because “I can find many presents. I like to cut cake. We go out together.”

I love to see the excitement on Darren’s face and his laughter on his BIG DAY.

“Happy Birthday, Darling Darren!”

Brendan is feeling much much better *hee*.

[With only a small little wound on his lip].

He can now start enjoying himself again, together with the family, just timely for the long weekend in Singapore in view of National Day celebration on coming Monday and school holiday on Tuesday *smile*.

For everyone who has shown concern for Brendan, we would like to say “THANK YOU“.

Have a wonderful weekend!

After the unfortunate injury of Brendan, a friend commented “It is so usual for kids to fall and injure themselves. When I was young, my mom would scold me instead when I fell. Kids, nowadays, are pampered because parents get so worried.”

This statement gives me some sentiments…..

True, it is usual for kids to fall.

I agree, it is part and parcel of growing up. Through falling, kids learn to pick themselves up and in a way become tougher.

[I scalded my stomach and injured my eyes too when I was young and the side effect of that eye  injury has since become permanent.  Similarly, Papa Ed had to undergo stitching on his face - one beside the lip and the other on his forehead too.]

So, it is not unusual for kids to injure themselves either after being too playful, careless or injured by other young ones. However, there is different severity to falling or other injuries. Certainly not good if our kids require stitching or suffer head injury or leg/hand injury which might affect their mobility even for a while. The risk is there and that’s why we always remind our kids to be careful.

Parents show concern for their kids in different ways.

Some motivate their kids to be strong when accidents happen, caution their kids the danger of certain actions and show concern outrightly.

Some might scold their kids for being playful or carelessly hurting themselves but still feeling very concerned within them.  

Others might not utter a word but care in other way like staying by their kids’ side, taking time to nurse them etc.

I happen to be the first type of parent who tends to show concern outrightly.  In fact, although I show my outright concern for my sons when they are hurt, it does not mean that I am pampering them. Oh dear, when a kid is bleeding badly, how can it be said that we are pampering him?

[We have through this incident share with Brendan too the spirits of being brave and strong and to help him build up his level of tolerance and confidence.]

I believe that it is not necessary that we model after our parents’ approach.

Seriously, it is only after I become a MOTHER that I start to appreciate that whatever the approach of my parents, they CARE ALOT for me.

It is only after becoming a MOTHER that I start to feel how a parent would ever feel so concerned and heartache for a child - especially her own child.

No matter how our parents react to situations when we are young, ultimately they are concerned.

The feelings and bond for our kids are so deep that only parents can understand and not for others to comment. Parents, do you agree with me?

—–

By the way, Brendan is recovering well except that he has also developed diarrhoea possibly due to allergy to the antibiotics. His wound on the lip will take 2 weeks to heal. He is walking well too *grin*

Not feeling so well he may be but he is really feeling HAPPY *wider grin*

The Get-Well card from his teachers and classmates have made him really cheeful.

I would really like to thank his 2 teachers who have been calling everyday to ask about his conditions and friends who dropped those beautiful words to make him laugh.

It is you who make everyday such a sunny day for Brendan and the reason for him to love school. THANK YOU *smile*

Finally, THANK YOU to our readers cum friends AND friends who understand our feelings and drop us those warm encouragements.

And to my mom and dad too who have been cooking porridge for Brendan everyday.

Really appreciate *smile*

One of the things that I fear most would happen to my children - happened again yesterday.

We received an emergency call from school. Brendan had quite a bad fall in school!

Oh Gosh! With a knock on the forehead, a cut and very swollen lip, and a limping leg, we had to rush him to A&E

[That is the risk of a child who runs with a heavy school bag. He apparently was rushing for his school bus due to late dismissal when he fell.]

Caution: The following photo may make you feel uncomfortable.

It has been a few encounters that Brendan had been sent to A&E for different reasons like a swollen forehead, injured leg, a bone in the throat - the little unpleasant incidents while in school.  

I know that no parent enjoys the experience at a A&E especially when the child appears weak, bleeding or suffering from injury.

 So, you can imagine what happened next when an anxious mom was in the A&E with her child who was bleeding, complaining of pain and lethargic, and having to wait for hours.

[Sigh, even an usually COOL mommy can behave PANICALLY under this situation]

The anxious Mommy (myself) was ….

[Somehow, does this sound familiar to you as a parent?]

- pacing up and down constantly enquiring when the child can be attended to (the 2 hours of waiting before the doctor appeared for initial diagnosis can really become hours of agony!)

- requesting for wheel chair, blanket, pillow and then regularly reminding the nurse for an empty bed for the child in the observation ward as soon as one was available

- constantly peeping at the board and wondering why the queue number was not moving

- praying hard while never failing to encourage the worried child

- trying to feel the pain of  the child

- keep checking on the child “hoping” to get the answers that he was feeling even better

- feeling sorry that the painful child was also suffering from hunger after hours of waiting for doctor

- negotiating with doctor whether a sedation is really necessary to perform the stitching on the lip (since there are all these side effects of faster heartbeats etc) and also what would  happen if there are complications since the child was also having a slight head injury)

- wondering what would be next since the child has to go through consultation, WAITING, X-ray, WAITING,consultation, MORE WAITING,  treatment of the lip with the cut and bleeding, WAITING AGAIN ….. 

Arghh….I am sure I do not have to describe further the feeling of an anxious mommy when her child is injured and the agony of WAITING. 

I could miss my meal or any other matters while waiting with him BUT I will never do less to compromise the health of my son.

Oh dear, a mommy can really feel as painful as the child especially in her heart.

Alas, after many hours…. PHEW!

Fortunately for us, there was no sedation, no stitching and Brendan was treated under a course of antibiotics and painkiller. We have been advised to monitor him since the fall had hit the head, the legs and we have decided to leave the open wound on the lip unstitched and to heal on its own.  Doctor did not want any complication with the usage of sedation in view of Brendan’s dizziness.

Next few days, I will be balancing between the organisation of Singapore National Day event  at work AND at the same time, nursing Brendan and observing his conditions.

It is going to be tough but….

I am glad that I have the company of Papa Ed this time.

[In past years, Papa Ed had been stationed overseas and that feeling of always being the only one with the kids in the hospital or nursing them can be really awful.]

As for now, I am just thankful that the ordeal will soon be over.

[Brendan, have a speedy recovery. Mommy, Papa and Didi love you. We are here for you *pat pat*.]