How do parents manage the situations when their kids are dishonest with them? Usually, when kids have done something against their parents’ wishes or without their parents’ knowledge, they could become dishonest.

My experience is that my young children (yes, take note that I use the word “young”) have occasionally started to remain silent, secretive or tell a little lie when they have done something that they know that I would be unhappy about. To avoid that scolding or tense situation, I guess this is the natural instinct that they adopt. Unfortunately, the story of  “Pinochio” (on the consequence of lying) does not seem to have much effect on today’s kids.

Dishonesty could intensify the atmosphere especially when the child ends up cranky and absolutely silent after being confronted. Often, if parents are not able to keep their cool, parents might never get the truth out of the kids. Hence, depending on the child, confrontational methods may not lead to any good solution.

So I learned and now I realize that my children respond better when I speak to them alone calmly after the incidents, explain to them their mistakes, give them time to ponder over it and then get them to share with me why they should not repeat the instances in future.

While it is important that we get the young children to say “sorry” when they are wrong, the important message is still for them to - realize their mistake. It is never good for dishonesty to be developed into a habit later in their life.