Congratulation to myself as I step into my 10^th year of motherhood journey. Perhaps, I should give myself a “PAT” because this journey, although fulfilling, has been a difficult one. Looking back, I have triumphed many lonely and helpless parenting moments especially when Papa Ed has to be stationed overseas, when my mum-in-law is also based far away in US, and when my mum often in her most sincere intention to help, ends up not seeing eye-to-eye on our parental approach. However, I am still grateful to my mum because without her presence, I would have felt lost …….

Still I would say, my boys have brought me the greatest joy, love and accomplishment.

Motherhood is a journey of:

· Trial and error (there is no single formula or path that suits all)

· Frustration and Joy (MUST be patient and all things will work well)

· Lost and Gain (do not be dishearten to feel lost for a moment because the spirits to explore/attempt will help us to gain much more)

· Understanding the behavior and heart of our children: Seeing the world from the eyes of our children, and feeling the future from the hearts of our children (Do not try to transform the character of our kids into someone they are not and do not map out a path for them to someone they do not wish to be)

· Learning from our children (as kids get older, I am impressed by the amount of knowledge exchange I can have with them)

· Being a friend and not a “dictator”

How motherhood has transformed my life (my true story….):

1) Kids are now my No. 1 priority in life. My shopping focus has shifted from myself to the kids. I now spend most of my after office hours with kids. Although I wish I could have more time for friends, my guilt will be stronger if I can’t even allocate my 3 hours a night out of 24 hours a day to my kids.

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: Kids’ bright smile and contented faces PLUS kids’ stronger bond with me.

2) My focus on vacation now is always where kids wanna be and what kids wanna do. With school holiday schedule as an added constraint, the holiday venues have become more limited. However, who cares as long as family is taking a wonderful break together? Every holiday is well-spent as long as kids are having an enjoyable time and places are “kids’ friendly”.

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: The kids’ laughter and fun

3) My main focus used to be on career development. Now kids’ and family development has become an important mission in life. It is definitely not easy to accord equal responsibility to both family and a career with heavy responsibilities. To give my kids a better future, I will persevere…

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: Kids’ excellent performance and well-being

4) It is funny how the kids have become my Elders as the model mummy will remember to “seek kids’ permission” and “time schedule” before committing my own programme, and bid kids’ goodnight wherever I am.

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: Kids’ happy and well-settled state

5) Unknowingly, I don’t know since when I am endowed with these strong qualitities :

· “Leader” – to lead the home empire

· “Shrewd accountant” – to save every little cent that matters

· “Pink Panther detective” – to sniff every little displeasure and jealousy of the kids

· “Judge” – to judge household rivalry with impartiality

· “Teacher” – to be a lifetime educator of the kids

· “Counsellor”

· “Mentor”

6) From an only daughter, who is well-taken care by my mum in every detail of my childhood, I now have to learn abit of every household chore

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: Exercise helps me keep fit

7) I cannot imagine myself going near any raw seafood and meat before and what’s more, handle them! Today, I am proud that circumstances have changed. I have mastered the skills of picking fresh meat, fruits and seafood. Thanks to the expert aunties at the supermarkets.

Mummy’s motivation/achievement: A new skill learnt and family’s well-taken care stomachs

8) I never know that my world is so self-focused and the extent of the space in my heart until I become a mother. Today, I have grown to be a stronger woman who can shoulder heavier responsibilities, developed a “bigger” heart, learn many meaningful life lessons and also to be more patient and tolerant.

9) My kids have given me the greatest motivation to obtain my driving licence, a task which I have given excuses for so long. Now, I truly understand the value of having a handy driving licence.

10) I have become more mindful of my actions and speeches because mummy has to set exemplary examples for the kids

Mummy’s motivation and achievement: I become a better person which benefits the kids too

This long list of achievements has convinced me that motherhood is a good transformation process. We mothers could have easily earned ourselves many medals if there is a competition on number of achievements that we have obtained in our lifetime <chuckle>.

Here is a beautiful song “Journey” …..

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Journey - Corrinne May